CHAPTER THREE
I woke up to someone saying my name.
It was Maya. She came back.
"Maya?"
"Yeah, it's me."
"What time is it?"
"It's almost 12 in the afternoon."
I sat up, rubbing my tired eyes awake.
"Where did you go?" Pretending not to know.
"I told you, I was getting another room to stay in, after what you said last night."
Why did she lie? Was she afraid to tell me she slept in a room with another man? I kept up the charade.
"Oh, yeah. I'm glad you're back though."
"Me, too. I had a hard time sleeping last night. Did a lot of thinking. I think I owe you an apology."
Not what I was expecting.
"Really?" I asked.
"Yeah, I thought about everything that has happened and I realize it's mostly my fault."
Now I was really curious to hear her explanation.
"How so?"
"We started fighting the moment you mentioned about your fantasy about seeing me with another man. And...I may have blown it up more than I should've"
Wow, she was taking some of the blame. Didn't think I would be off the hook this easily.
"Well, I did mention it at the worst time." I tried taking some of the blame back.
"True, but you were opening up to me something very personal, and I should've been more understanding."
"I shouldn't have said anything in the first place. You're perfect." I leaned in for a kiss which she happily returned.
"Thank you for being so understanding," she said.
"Thank YOU for being so understanding," I replied.
We both hugged for what felt like forever. It felt good to hold her like that again. Another moment, where I forgot the dilemma I was in. But just for a moment.
"I'm in the mood for some coffee. Do you want some?" I offered.
"No, that's okay. Did you want to get lunch at the buffet?"
"No, I just want to relax for a little bit here before we start our day. Is that alright?"
"Yeah, sure. I actually planned our day already. You remember Anthony?"
My heart sank hearing my wife say his name.
"Yeah?"
"He's going to take us to do fun activities the Resort has to offer. I thought I saw the best there was yesterday, but according to Anthony, there is better stuff to do!"
"Oh okay, sounds like it could be fun."
I made my way to the Keurig and poured myself some coffee. I was trying to think what could I offer her to drink so to put her in the right mood.
"Babe?" Maya said from our bedroom.
"Yeah?"
"There's a fruity cocktail drink I got yesterday, in the fridge. Could you give it to me, please?"
Thank God.
"Sure thing, hon'."
I carried her drink in one hand, and my coffee in the other, to the bedroom.
She was sitting down on the edge of the bed with her legs crossed, typing away on her phone. I didn't notice the dress she was wearing. I know this dress well because it's one of my favorites. The top of the dress ended almost covering the top part of her dress which went around her back. It was a little tight so the top of her boobs would bulge, look like it's about to spill out.
"Here you go, babe." I handed the drink to her.
"Thank you," she took it showing thanks.
"Who are you texting?"
"Anthony. He's wondering when we should meet him. I really like him. He's a good guy. He and I have so much in common, which is a huge relief. I thought I've known guys like him my whole life. I was waiting for him to hit on me or put his hands on me but he never did."
"That's good. He does sound like a good guy." I assured her.
I just stood there looking dumb with my coffee at hand, waiting for her to take a drink. Luckily, she didn't seem to notice.
"He wants to meet up in an hour. How does that sound to you?" She looked up at me waiting for an answer.
"Uhhh, yeah, that works for me."
"Great. I'll let him know."
Maya still hasn't drunk anything yet. I was getting anxious, not really knowing why.
"What kind of drink is that?" I asked, hoping to move things along.
"A special signature cocktail created by the island. Anthony bought me one, and I loved it. I wanted to save it for later to enjoy."
"Did you want to try?" She offered.
"No, thank you. I'll stick with the coffee." I took a sip of my own drink.
She took another long sip as she finalized her texts to Anthony.
"Okay, it's all set. We'll be meeting him along with other tourists we met yesterday for another great day."
"Can't wait," I lied.
She got up walking seductively towards me.
"What do you want to do for an hour?" She started rubbing her hands on my chest, trying for the umpteenth time to initiate sex.
Instead of trying to stop her, I tried starting a conversation.
"You know, I have to say, I am really impressed you took the time to understand my strange interest. Not many women would, I think."
"I try for my man." She said, now giving me kisses on my neck.
"Do you want to know why I have that fantasy? Why I want you to do something like that for me?"
She stopped her kisses and looked me in the eye.
"Yeah, now that you mentioned it. I should've asked you that. Tell me."
With her hands around my waist, she waited for a response.
"You're just so beautiful. You're everything a man wants. I feel so blessed that I want to share the wealth, so to speak. It's almost a crime to have you all to myself."
I used some of the cruel words Anthony said to me last night as reinforcement.
"Aww, that's kind of sweet, in a strange way," she teased.
"Yeah, well, it's not that hard for me to picture you with another man. It doesn't get me upset at all. It gets me really hot and bothered."
"Really?"
"Oh yeah. In fact, I think you should be lucky. Not too many husbands will share their wives with other men, you know?"
Maya looked confused at first, then looked like she was giving it some thought.
"Yeah, I guess you're right. I do feel lucky you're not like other insecure men who can't stand for their woman to be with another man. You're an amazing man."
She planted a long kiss on my lips. It felt just right. I planned my next move after we broke our kiss.
"This crazy idea came to me last night when you were gone. I'm not sure I should mention it but since you accepted that part of me, I... I don't know," I said pretending to sound unsure.
"What is it, baby? You can tell me anything. I promise I won't blow up like I did last time. I swear."
"Thanks. That's good to know. Okay, well, last night when I was in bed thinking about where you were...I secretly hoped...that you...were with...Anthony."
It was harder than I thought to say that last part. She gave me a very surprised look.
"Really?" She sounded like she couldn't believe her ears.
"Yeah, I mean, I also could see you two being together. I'm not insecure to say he looks like a hunk. A hunk with you by... his side."
Maya laughed. I almost laughed myself. I sounded so lame.
"I have to admit, he's a good-looking guy. And I had thought about whether I would be with him or not."
"And?"
"Yeah, maybe. A different time, a different place, perhaps. Who knows? But in this life I'm yours."
"Of course, you're mine. But I could definitely see me giving you permission to be with a guy like Anthony. Just for one night."
Maya was surprised yet again. I think was looking to see if I was kidding or not.
"Wait. You want me to hook up with Anthony? Like now? During our honeymoon?"
"Yeah. It wouldn't bother me at all. I really do want to see you be with Anthony. Just for one night."
Maya let me go to walk back to the bed to sit down. I couldn't tell if she was upset again.
She just sat there staring into nothing, thinking. I didn't dare say or do anything. My heart was beating so fast.
After what felt like an eternity, she said, "Wow, Robert, I don't know what to say."
Still had no idea if that was a good or bad thing.
"I thought maybe this was something we would try years from now. If we ever do! I didn't think it would be now on our honeymoon."
"So... you would do it?"
"No!" She looked at me angrily.
Damn.
"Robert, what am I supposed to think that my husband would rather watch another man sleep with his wife before him? Huh?"
Good question.
"I think of it...as a sign of trust."
"What?"
"I just told you something very secretive and personal about me. That wasn't easy to do. It would show not only you respect my beliefs but also trust me in a whole new level. If anything, it would make me love you more."
Maya scoffed, not really knowing what to say. She didn't say anything for a while. I couldn't stand the silence.
"What are you thinking about now, Maya?"
"Honestly? I don't know. And that scares me."
"Why?"
"I really want to fight with you again but the things you're telling me...doesn't sound so ridiculous..."
Oh, my God.
"...yet it makes me question your manhood if you would let any guy have his way with me. Your wife."
"You shouldn't think of it like that."
"Then there's another thought, well, more like a feeling. A feeling I can't shake away."
"What's that?"
"Excitement." She finally looked at me. "It makes me feel excited."
Maya began to cry, running to the bathroom, closing and locking the door.
I debated whether or not I should press my luck and keep convincing her. I walked up to the bathroom door, pressing my ear on it. I could hear her quietly sobbing.
"Hon, it's not the worst thing in the world. Nothing would change between us."
"How can you be so sure?" She said, barely hearing her between sobs. "Aren't you afraid I'll stop loving you?"
"Of course, but you know what? I can tell you right now, I'm not afraid I will stop loving you. That will never change for anything in the world."
"You say that now, but will you say the same thing when the time comes?"
"When", huh? Wow. I felt conflicted as I felt relieved that Anthony’s plan was working but turmoil that my wife is willing to sleep with another man first before me. It's not what I wanted.
"I know I will."
"Is that why you won't sleep with me?"
"Kind of. It hurt, that you felt disgusted when I mentioned my fantasy. I think subconsciously I didn't want to have sex until you prove to me that you're sympathetic to my wishes."
I waited for another minute before I spoke again.
"Forget I mentioned it, babe. I don't know what I was thinking. C'mon, let's get ready to meet up with Anthony so we can have a good day, alright? What do you say?"
Her sobs died down, followed by her clearing her nose and throat.
"Yeah, we should probably get going. Let me change first."
"Okay, hon'."
I waited out in the living room watching television while I waited. I was thinking what could wrong with Anthony’s plan? It was still a no-win situation for me. If Maya doesn't sleep with Anthony, I would be in some serious trouble. But if Maya does sleep with him, I risk losing her forever.
At the end of the day, I would rather sacrifice her than myself. Anthony was right. I'm not a man. A man wouldn't let his wife take the fall. He should protect her and put himself before her. And I failed. Two days being a married man and I failed.
I was just about to cry when Maya finally popped out.
"Hey, you ready?" I said, rubbing my eyes to fight back the tears.
"Yeah," she said.
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I was just a little...overwhelmed. Let's just try to have a good day, okay?"
"Sure, babe."
I held her hand as we made our way to the hotel entrance. Along the way there, I got a text from Anthony. Lucky for me, Maya did not care to glance over to see my texts.
"The plan today: spend very little time with Maya. I'll keep her company. You're in charge of holding all water bottles. It's gonna be a long day =)"
This was getting out of control. And yet, what else can I do? Maya was already feeling the effects from the alcohol. The idea of turning my fantasy into a reality doesn't sound so crazy anymore. Instead of being upset, she feels guilty. Guilty for thinking about being with another man first before me on our honeymoon. I have to be strong. And strong for Maya. It's a morbid feeling to hope she doesn't succumb to his whims and that she does.
All I texted back was, "ok."