TITLE    : Beer, Pussy, and Wienerschnitzel
STORYID  : beer-pussy-and-wienerschnitzel
SUMMARY  : What more could a guy ask?
AUTHOR   : Ephesus14@lit
DATE     : 2018-07-29
CATEGORY : adult-romance
FLAGS    : h
TAGS     : |romance|romantic|


<i>It takes quite a talent to make a bunch of words not only readable, but worthy of being read. Thank you once again, <b>Flavian</b>.



There is no sex in this story.</i>



*****



<b>Beer, Castles, Pussy, and Wienerschnitzel ...</b> What more could a guy ask for?



Mandy (Amanda) and I were married for 13 years before she lost control of her car on an icy patch of Highway 36 outside of Lyons, Colorado, and tumbled down an embankment to her death. It took me almost two years before my life started to get back to normal.



I was six when my family moved to Longmont, Colorado. We moved into a house on Bowen Street right next door to the Roman family. They had three children. Two sons and Amanda. She was also six. My family had four children. All boys.



Mandy and I went through school, up to and including college, together. Her degree was in Chemistry and she was hired by a pharmaceutical company two months before graduation. My degree is in Business. It took me several months after graduation to become gainfully employed, but when I did it was for an international cement company with headquarters in Denver. Both of our places of employment were in downtown Denver and were fairly close to each other so we rode together most days. We always planned to move from Longmont to Denver, but we never got around to it. 



Mandy wanted to get married right after graduation, but I wanted to wait until I had a job. Three months after I started, we were married in St. Stephen's Episcopal Church in Longmont.



We never dated anyone other than each other our entire lives. In fact, the only person other than Mandy I ever kissed on the lips was my Aunt Sally. Actually, I never kissed her; but she invariably kissed me, and I hated it. I remember making sure I always had a handkerchief to wipe my mouth when I knew she was coming to visit us or we were going to visit her.



I could say that the 13 years we were married were the happiest years of my life, but that would be wrong. The totality of my life from age six onward was the happiest because Mandy was always there. I do not recall a single major argument or disagreement between us that entire time. Even my desire that we wait to get married was accepted without argument. It's wasn't that I controlled our lives. I didn't have to argue with her. I gave in to her just as often as she gave in to me. It was a true fifty-fifty relationship.



Even now when I think of her my heart smiles.



As far as our sex life is concerned, suffice it to say that we thought it was pretty good although neither of us had anything to compare it to ... except a few porno movies we watched in hotel rooms during our travels. Almost every time we had sex, she would look at me with a gleam in her eye and a smile on her face and ask. "Do you think you can handle this?" 



I miss her.



I have already mentioned that it took almost two years for my life to start getting back to normal. My family, her family, all of our friends, co-workers of both of us; all encouraged me to 'have dates' or 'get a girlfriend' or 'take a vacation'. 



One evening I was watching television in the living room I had shared with Mandy. A commercial came on for a cruise on the Rhine River. I remembered watching the same, or almost the same, commercial with Mandy. Commercials like that all seem very similar. Occasionally, after seeing an ad like this, she and I would discuss the possibility of actually taking one of those cruises. As I said, I had seen it many times over the years, but for some reason this time I really watched it and decided that I would do it.



So, I did some research. There was a 13 day cruise from Zurich, Switzerland to Amsterdam, The Netherlands, which caught my interest. I hadn't had a vacation since before Mandy died so I told my boss what I was considering. Not only did he think it was a good idea, he encouraged me to do it.



"Listen, Matt. I think I can sweeten the pot. Our plant in Westbury, England, has been doing great and I was going to go over there and pass out some bonus checks. You could do me a favor and do it for me while you are over there."



"That'll work. You pay all of my airfare and expenses for that portion of my trip and I'll do it; but I've decided that I'm going first class."



"Get with the travel department when you get your schedule. We'll spring for business class on the airplane. If you want to upgrade from there, it's on you. Fair enough?"



"Fair enough."



"Have them call me if he has any questions." 



Within two weeks, I had booked my suite on the ship, made my airline reservations, and applied for my passport. I was starting to develop a little excitement about the cruise. Here I was 39 years old and I had never been out of the United States. 



The flight over was fantastic. On board the airplane before 'push back' we were served our choice of drinks. The lady in the cubicle next to mine seemed to enjoy Champagne. After we were airborne, the flight attendant asked her if she wanted another glass. The lady replied. "Only if the bottle is open."



The flight attendant went away and we heard the 'pop' of the cork. She brought the lady her glass and said. "In first class the bottle is always open." 



I was going to play tourist for a couple of days in Zurich before boarding the ship. After landing and clearing customs and immigration, I was met by my driver who took me to my hotel. I wanted to spend the day walking around, but jet lag was kicking my ass so I went to bed. I did manage to tour that beautiful city the next day, however, and doing it with a private car and driver was the only way to go.



The day came to board the ship. The hotel was one that the cruise company used so a bus picked up three of us, then picked up more at another hotel, then another and so on until the bus was full, then we headed for Basel and the ship.



We boarded the ship and were shown our cabins; or, in my case, suite. There were two suites onboard. When I was shown into the suite, I was really glad I had decided to go first class. It was very nice and my luggage, somehow, was already there, so I unpacked before touring the ship. 



Common areas were somewhat lacking; the largest being the dining room which doubled as theatre, auditorium, and ballroom. The top, outside deck was, by far, the most popular area and was the location of the welcome reception, buffet, and sail-away party.



The buffet had been removed and most of the passengers were standing, sitting, dancing, drinking and otherwise just generally socializing. I'd had difficulty in social situations since Mandy died and found myself with a rare bottle of beer leaning over the rail watching the traffic on the road alongside the river. All of the tables were occupied and I didn't feel much like sharing. I was beginning to regret my decision to make this trip. I took a sip of beer and turned to go down to my suite when I heard a voice.



"You may sit here if you like." Said a voice with what appeared to be a British/English accent. 



"Excuse me?"



"I said you may sit here if you like."



I looked and there was a man about my age sitting by himself at a table with three empty chairs.



"No, thank you. I was just going to my cabin."



"Suit yourself, but I could use the company."



What the hell; so I sat. "Matt. Matt O'Reilly." I said extending my hand.



Taking it he responded, "David Bryan. You cruising alone?"



"Yes. You?"



"No, my wife is around here someplace. Is this your first Rhine cruise?"



"It's my first cruise of any kind. You?"



"Oh, no. We've been on eight river cruises so far."



"So you must really enjoy them."



"My wife more than me."



So we sat and chatted. Before I knew it, he had ordered another drink for both of us. A beer for me, and a gin and tonic for himself. I'm not usually a beer drinker, but had always heard that European beer was the best; so, I figured I would try it. Since the cruise started in Switzerland, they had a local beer on board and I was drinking a bottle of it. It was 'Ueli' and was pretty good. I found out later that it was a microbrew and was usually just served in a couple of restaurants but was available on this ship in limited quantities.



Our chat covered lots of territory. We talked about it being my first trip and he explained what I should expect. I learned they had been on this ship before; and had already been onboard for a week. It seems they like the crew and the ship. They were also in the only other suite onboard, so we were neighbors.



Almost two hours and two Ueli's later, his wife joined us. An attractive lady, she bounced up to us and kissed her husband on the forehead.



"Did you have fun?"



"Yes, I did." She said with a grin.



"Gwen, this is Matt. Matt, my wife Gwendolyn."



I stood and reached my hand out. "My pleasure, Gwendolyn."



"Likewise, and it's Gwen, please. Has my husband been boring you?" She asked as she sat and took a sip of his drink."



"Not at all. It was the other way round I'm sure."



So we sat and chatted for another thirty minutes. Finally, he said. "I suppose it's time we went below dear. Ready?"



"Of course."



She stood and walked to stand behind him. 



I stood and watched as she pulled his wheelchair out and started to push him away. "Nice meeting you, Matt. I'm sure we'll be seeing more of you."



The whole time we were sitting there, I had not noticed that he was in a wheelchair. 



My first night aboard I slept like a log...I'm sure the Ueli's helped. The next morning found us in Breisach, Germany, and I was on a bus for an excursion to the Black Forest. It was a rather large bus but only half full. Our first stop was at a woodworking shop where they made nutcrackers. I appreciate people who work with their hands and it was fun to watch these craftsmen. Several of our group bought nutcrackers. After our tour and lunch in a local restaurant ... and another local beer ... we loaded back on the bus for the trip back to the ship. About thirty minutes into the trip, the bus hit a bump and something fell from the luggage rack above me and hit me on the head.



A yelp immediately came from the seat behind me and, no sooner had I been hit than a very attractive woman plopped into the empty seat beside me, grabbed the offending object - which turned out to be a nutcracker - tossed it over the seat, and started examining my head.



"Blimey. Are you all right? Oh, no, you're not; you're bleedin'. Oh, my god."



"I'm fine." I told her, not wanting to draw any more attention to myself, even though my head hurt like a bitch.



"No, you're not. You're bleedin'." She insisted.



Apparently, there was a minor cut on my head with a couple of drops of blood, but she acted as if I were dying. After she was convinced that I would neither bleed to death nor go into shock, she calmed down. Her name was Maier Valmai Wilkinson, but everybody called her Val; and she was from Birmingham, England, and she and her brother owned several Chippy's (fish and chip shops) around town. I also learned that, in her opinion, cod was the only fish reputable shops would use. 



And so it went for the rest of the trip back to the ship. I sat and listened to her almost constant chatter and smiled the entire time. By the time we were back on board, it was decided that I should have dinner with her and her friends.



When I arrived for dinner, Val was sitting with a couple. She introduced them as her oldest friends. John and Cynthia Halford. Dinner was fun. We had Wienerschnitzel with Spatzle (a kind of noodle thing and very tasty) and salad ... plus I had the obligatory beer. It was the best meal I had had in a long time. The food was great and the company was even better. As I had done on the bus, I listened much more than I talked. Listening to the three of them was a treat. The stories were never ending and the jokes, for the most part, were hilarious. 



After dinner the four of us went back upstairs to the top deck where a German Oompah band was playing and beer was flowing. We found a table and for the rest of the evening, sipped beer and talked.



The next day, we were in Strasbourg, France. Val and I spent the day walking around. We visited the Gothic Cathedral (her idea) and the medieval section of the city (my idea). We were near the ship when we saw David and Gwendolyn Bryan going aboard. Two of the crew were aiding him as she watched. The cruise director supervised.



"You've heard about them, I suppose." Said Val.



"I had a couple of drinks with them. Sad, really. I wonder what happened to him."



"Don't know, but my cabin steward says they have been on the ship before and, whenever they are aboard, she spends a lot of time in the Cruise Director's cabin."



"Really?"



"The rumor is that he can't ... you know ... he can't ... shag any more; so they come on river cruises to give her a chance to get some."



"We've just been on the ship for a couple of days and you found that out already?" 



"I guess people just tell me things."



We made our way on board and agreed to have dinner together. 



And so it went for three more days. The Halford's, Val, and I spent most of our time together. They were curious as to why I was cruising alone. I told them I had lost my wife and that this was my first vacation in a long time. I also told a bit about my job and that I was going to Westbury, England, at the end of the cruise, and that I would be there for just one day. They told me that they had been to Florida, but never to Colorado.



One evening the four of us sat in my suite, had a few drinks and watched the world go by. I decided that I could get used to this.



Then things changed. Half of my vacation had gone by. I had seen and briefly chatted with the Bryan's; both together and individually several times. And I had heard the same thing Val had told me about them. On two occasions, I had seen her with the Cruise Director. The first time I had just left David on the top deck chatting with someone and was going into my suite when the door to the Bryan suite opened and the Cruise director came out. He nodded to me as we passed.



The other time, I saw her coming out of the crew section of the ship. Passengers were not normally allowed there.



That evening we had another buffet on the top deck; brats, sauerkraut and beer. I ate until I was stuffed and drank until I was a bit tipsy. Val and I were sitting at a table when David wheeled himself up and asked if he could join us. Val hesitated, but I said, sure.



A member of the crew moved a chair to make room for the wheelchair while another crewmember put David's plate of food and bottle of beer on the table. We talked for a while and finally he asked. 



"Matt, are you going to the castle tomorrow?" The castle he was referring to one was one of only two on the Rhine River which had not been destroyed. It had been owned by the same family for 800 years. 



"I certainly am. Wouldn't miss it."



"How about you, Mrs. Wilkinson? Are you going?"



"I've seen my share of castles. My friends and I are going to a vineyard." She said, not trying to hide her disdain for him.



"How about you, David? Are you and Gwen going?" I asked.



"Not me. They are not set up to handle my chair and me. But Gwen would like to go. Would you consider letting her tag along with you?"



"Sure." As soon as I said it, I knew it was the wrong thing to say. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Val shoot a look in my direction; and it wasn't a very nice look.



We talked for another 30 minutes or so; well, mostly David and I talked. Val was uncharacteristically quiet. Later I was walking her to her cabin and she spoke. "Are you really taking her with you tomorrow?"



"Sure. Why not?"



"Well, you know her reputation."



"So?"



"Do you plan to shag her?"



I stopped and looked at her. "What did you say?"



"Do you plan to shag her?"



"Of course not. Why would you even ask?"



"Because she's been shagging the Cruise Director."



"Even if that's true, it doesn't mean that I'm going to fuc ... er ... shag her."



"Well, if you go with her, the other passengers will think you did."



"I don't give a give a good goddamn what the other passengers think. How the Bryans, or anybody else, decide to live their lives is of no concern to me or anybody else. One of the big problems in this world is that we don't mind our own business."



There was a long silence as we continued the walk to her cabin. At her door, I asked. "Are we still on for dinner tomorrow?"



"I don't think so." 



I stood there as she unlocked her door and went in. Neither of us spoke.



David and Gwen were just coming down the hallway when I got to my suite. 



"Good evening, Matt." Said Gwen. "David told me about tomorrow. I'll meet you at the gangway at nine. Okay?"



"Of course."



In the week we had been on the ship, David and Gwen had been nothing but nice to me. What they did in their private lives was of no concern to me. And to my way of thinking it was nobody else's concern either. 



At nine the next morning I was standing by the gangway when Gwen came up to me.



"Ready?"



She smiled and said, "Let's go." 



"Hey, wait a second, you two."



I looked back at the ship to see Val and the Halfords running toward us.



"Do you have room for three more?"



I just looked at them. Val looked directly at me, smiled sheepishly, and shrugged her shoulders. I sat beside Gwen on the bus which took us to the castle.



So the five of us went to the castle and had a perfect day. There was lots of laughter, jokes, and stories, as there generally seemed to be when Val was around. When we arrived back at the ship, Gwen kissed me on the cheek in the European manner, thanked me and walked away. Then Val took both of my hands in hers and kissed me the same way. 



"Thank you for a lovely day. And thank you for being the man you are. See you at dinner?"



I nodded. Quite a change from last night.



Dinner was interesting. Val and the Halfords, were, again, seated when I arrived. I had always heard that Brits felt that, if they weren't five minutes early for everything, they felt like they were late. There was some small talk before and after we ordered our drinks and dinner. After the drinks arrived, John Halford proposed a toast. "May those of us who sometimes go out of their way to find fault with, and condemn, others, find better uses for our time." We all clinked our glasses.



Then we went on to discuss why it was none of our business what the Bryans, or anybody else, did. 



"Matt, I'm so ashamed of the way I acted with Mr. Bryan. Cynthia, John, and I talked about it last night and we agree that whatever they do is, and should be, none of our business...unless they want it to be. He has been nothing but nice and kind to me during the few times we have spent time together. And Gwen is a dear. We thoroughly enjoyed spending the day with her."



After dinner, Val and I went, again, to the top deck. David and Gwen were at a table alone.



"May we join you?" Asked Val



"Certainly. Gwen was just telling me about your day."



"Oh, my goodness, it was delightful." Said Val. And she was off. The Val I had learned to know...the funny, talkative one was back. She had been talking almost steadily for 30 minutes when our Cruise Director walked up to the table. He walked over and put his arm around Gwen, who reached up and patted his hand.



"Good evening." He said.



Val and I looked at each other before repeating the greeting.



Gwen spoke. "Val, Matt, I'd like for you to meet my brother. Thomas Smythe. You know him as Tommy."



"Your brother?" Asked Val darting her head between Tommy and Gwen.



Laughing, David said. "I'm afraid so."



"Well, bugger."



We all laughed.



We stayed and talked for awhile longer before excusing ourselves. We started walking along the deck.



"I have some nice wine in my room if you're interested."

<hr pg="2" />"That would be nice." Val responded.



Ten minutes later we were standing at the large window in my suite with glasses of wine in our hands watching Germany glide by. Val put her glass on the table by the window. Then she took mine and set it beside hers. She looked at me. "I think it's about time."



Then she kissed me. Not the European cheek to cheek kiss, but a full blown lip-to-lip, right-smack-dab- on-the-mouth kiss. As I have already mentioned, the only person I had ever kissed on the lips was Mandy. Aunt Sally kissed me but I always hated it and never kissed her back; and I don't remember if my mother ever kissed me on the lips like I have seen some mothers do to their children.



Her lips were on mine for about five seconds before my dick started to harden; and that only took a second-and-a-half.



Again, as a reminder, not only had I never kissed anyone but Mandy, but I had never had sex with anyone but her, either ... but I had the feeling that was about to change and, apparently, my dick was more than ready.



We kissed for a couple of minutes and my dick was so hard that it seemed to stick out in front of me so far that our lower bodies no longer touched except where my dick was poking her. She remedied that in pretty short order by wiggling her body so that my dick finally worked its way sideways and our bodies touched again.



She moved her head back so she could look directly at me. "I want you to know that I'm not in the habit of doing this."



Then I said the absolute dumbest thing I have ever said in my life ... "It's been a long time so be gentle."



Her face had started moving in to kiss me again, but my stupid-assed comment stopped her. She looked at me again. "Did you really just say that?"



Red-,faced, I tried to move away from her. "I'm afraid I did. I'm sorry."



She had a big grin on her face when she said, "You better be afraid...very afraid; because I don't plan on being gentle." And she started undressing me. 



It was probably the most embarrassing night of my life. I did nothing right. I don't remember the first time Mandy and I had sex being as bad as that evening with Val. I fumbled, groped, hesitated, choked and, the worst part, lost my hardon and never fully got it back. We were both naked and I could look at that beautiful lady and almost immediately spring a woody and then, just as quickly, lose it whenever she touched it. I enjoyed touching and tasting her breasts; and she enjoyed it as well; but, again, my useless flesh betrayed me.



This went on for over an hour before, in frustration, we both just lay naked on my bed looking at the ceiling. Finally she turned to look at me, gently stroked my face and said. "Would you like to talk about it?" I had only told her that I was a widower and what my job was. I had not told her anything else.



So I told her about my life ... and Mandy. I lay flat on my back and continued to look at the ceiling as I spoke. She listened. When I was finished, she leaned over me, kissed me tenderly on the cheek, and got up. She put on her skirt and blouse, picked up her panties and bra and stuffed them in her purse, then picked up her shoes and went to the door. She opened it and paused for a couple of seconds. Then spoke.



"I don't know of anyone who could compete with that. I know I can't."



The door closed softly behind her as she left.



I finally fell asleep around three in the morning. At ten I was awake. I showered and went up to the top deck. An awning had been set up. I sat beneath it looking at the small German town we were docked in. 



At noon, I watched as Val and the Halfords, apparently returning from an excursion, boarded the ship. They never looked up. 



I went to my cabin, where I decided I couldn't spend the rest of the cruise avoiding Val and the Halfords. I had no reason to believe that they would tell anyone about my inability to perform sexually, but I felt that every time somebody looked at me, they would know; and they would laugh. So I decided to cut the cruise short. I told the front desk that I would be leaving the next morning when we docked in Cologne and asked if they could have a taxi to take me to the airport. I opened my laptop for the first time this week and changed my flight. I was now flying from Cologne to London instead of Amsterdam to London. I also changed my hotel and car and driver reservations.



We docked at seven. Several buses were waiting to take passengers on excursions around the city. At the end of the gangway stood a man holding a sign with my last name on it. One of the ship's crew had carried my bags and I followed him off the ship. I indicated to the taxi driver that I was the O'Reilly he was waiting for. He took one of the bags from the crewman and led us to his taxi. I had tipped the crewman, gotten in the taxi, and was closing the door when I looked back at the ship and saw Val standing on the top deck looking at me. I closed the door and said to the driver, "Flughafen, bitte."



By six that evening, I was in London and still had four days to go before I was scheduled to be in Westbury to pass out the bonus checks. I spent three of the four days touring that big, beautiful city and felt very comfortable and welcomed there. 



On my first full day, I rode the Get-On-Get-Off tour bus which hit the major touristy things. On my way back to my hotel, I even got fish and chips from a Chippy, and felt proud of myself. I know, I know, pretty silly to be proud of doing something so basic, but nevertheless I did. And I remembered Val telling me that I should never ask for tomato sauce (catsup) with my chips. I smiled when I remembered her.



I was scheduled to be at our Westbury plant at noon so I, again, hired a car and driver. There was no way I was going to rent a car and drive myself. The driver got me there at eleven. He pulled up in front of the administration building and I got out. I went inside and introduced myself to the receptionist.



"We've been expecting you, Mr. O'Reilly. Mr. Murphy will be with you shortly. In the meantime, your guest has been waiting for you in the conference room."



"My Guest?"



"Yes, sir. The conference room is at the end of the hall."



The door had 'Conference Room' on it, so I went in. 



She stood when the door opened. "Hello, Matt."



"Hello, Val. What are you doing here?"



Before she could answer, I heard. "Mr. O'Reilly, I'm Tim Murphy. Pleasure to meet you."



I turned to see a huge bear of a man. Not an ounce of fat on him. He was just huge. And he had the biggest grin I have ever seen. I liked him instantly.



"Hello, Mr. Murphy. This is "Val Wilkinson."



"Yes. We've already met. Denver told me you would be here, but they never told me why. So, what can we do for you?"



"I'd like to see these five people plus yourself as soon as I can, Mr. Murphy." And I gave him a list of names.



"All at once, or one at a time?"



"At the same time, if I could, please."



"How about in 15 minutes right here?"



"That's fine."



"Grand. I'll get them here. In the meantime, you and Mrs. Wilkinson can wait in my office." And he led us there and left us.



I looked at Val. "You started to tell me why you are here."



"I ... uh ... I knew what I wanted to say ... until I saw you."



"How did you know I would be here?"



"You told us what your job was and that you would be in Westbury after the cruise; and, since there's only one cement company here, I didn't have much difficulty figuring it out."



The embarrassment I experienced that night in my cabin came back to me and I walked to the office window. I felt her beside me and we both just stood there. I turned to her.



"Listen, what we did ... or tried to do on the ship was a mistake. I embarrassed both of us and made a fool out of myself. I know that, so you didn't have to come here to remind ..." 



She put her finger on my lips.



"Shhh. Let me speak. I've only known two men in my life. By 'known' I mean in the biblical sense. They were both long term relationships. My brother and I found ourselves so engrossed in our shops that neither of us married. I was not looking for a man on the cruise. Cynthia, John, and I just wanted a fortnight of travel, relaxation, and a few laughs. Then that bloody nutcracker hit you and things changed."



Just then Tim Murphy came in. "All set, Mr. O'Reilly." We started to leave.



"Should I wait here?" Asked Val.



"No, come with us."



Tim Murphy joined the others in a little group. "Should we sit?"



"No, no this is just fine." I reached in my inside jacket pocket and pulled out six envelopes. "Whenever the Denver office has bad news to deliver, I'm the poor sod they send. So whenever any of our plants hear that I'm on the way, they start finding places to hide." I waved the envelopes in the air. "Termination notices are delivered in envelopes like these." I looked from one face to another and saw gloom, despair, and pain in all of them. "But not this time." And I looked at the name typed on the first envelope.



"Timothy Murphy." I handed it to him and waited for him to open it. The other five just looked on. He slowly opened it and took out the check. His face went from dark and sad to bright and lively. 



"Well, bugger me." He said as he showed the others his check for 19,000 British Pounds. "What's this all about?"



I waited to answer him until I had given out the other checks.



"International Cement has had what we call a 'Banner Year'. Our production and sales numbers have been off the chart. A large part of that is attributed to this facility and we felt that this was an appropriate way of thanking you. In addition to this bonus, you will receive what I think you call a 'pay rise' starting the first of the month."



It took several minutes for things to settle down. Tim announced that pints would be available for all of us at the local Pub as his treat. I declined and said that I had to return to London because I was flying home the next day. When I said that, I saw Val look at me. Her head seemed to tilt to one side and the smile she had disappeared. I told Tim that my car was waiting and I had to leave. He escorted Val and me to my waiting car. He thanked me and said I could come back anytime...as long as I brought more checks. Then he went back inside.



Val and I just looked at each other. "There is a small park down the road. Do you have time to let me finish my speech?" She asked.



"Of course. Should we take the car?"



"I'll meet you. It's just down there. You can't miss it." And she walked off. My driver held the door open for me and I got in. I was tempted to tell him to head for London ... but I didn't. Ten minutes later, I was sitting on a bench as she walked up and sat.



"Where was I?"



"The nutcracker had just hit me on the head."



"Right. Well, there you were; bloody and defenseless." I started to interrupt and tell her I was neither, but she stopped me. "This is my story and I'll tell it my way. Anyway, It only took me about five minutes to know that you were special and that I wanted to spend time with you."



"I didn't speak, because YOU wouldn't be quiet." 



"That's what made you special. You didn't feel it necessary to talk about yourself and how wonderful you are. You sat there as I prattled on, boring you with the most elementary and juvenile claptrap." 



I had no idea that anyone in England knew the word claptrap.



"And you just smiled. It was that bloody flippin' smile that got me. And then we carried on for days and you made no attempt to even kiss me. I've had to fight off blokes and there was this flippin' Yank I wanted to kiss, but he just ignored me. Then he takes the side of some bird who everybody thinks is shagging the ship's whole bloody crew only to find out she isn't. I didn't know what to do with you. So I decided to take matters into my own hands; and we both know the disaster that turned out to be."



"I don't need to be reminded of that night, thank you very much."



"Yes you do, you twit. You told me about your wife and you melted my heart. I felt such an arse that I hated myself for forcing you to do something you didn't want to do."



"Whoa ... wait just a minute. You didn't force me to do anything. I wanted to do it ... I just couldn't and I embarrassed you and I was ashamed."



"Are all Yanks as dumb as you?"



And so it went. Arguing about who felt the worst and was the most apologetic for that night. Finally, I held up my hand. "That's enough. No more. It was a mistake and we can't take it back. It's a moot point anyway because I leave tomorrow and we won't see each other again; so you made the trip for nothing."



She looked at me like 'are you fucking insane?' and then spoke. "I don't think I made the trip for nothing. When I saw you get in that car the day you left the ship, part of me left with you. I knew you were hurting and, after thinking about it, I knew I wanted to try to help; and I didn't want to lose you. I was hoping that, if we talked and spent some time together, that we could work things out. I don't want to replace your wife, Matt, and I know you don't want to replace her; but I can't help but feel that you have room in your heart for another love. And I would like for that to be me."



We sat in silence for a long time. Then I stood and walked a few steps before turning back to look at her before I spoke. "How will this work? Long distance relationships are tough."



She stood and walked to stand in front of me. She reached in her purse and pulled out an airline ticket folder. "I'm going to Denver tomorrow and I hope it's on the same plane you are on. I had my choice of two American based airlines and I chose one. I had a fifty-fifty chance it was the same as yours.



I looked and saw the familiar corporate logo and smiled.



"There it is again. That flippin' smile. Does that mean it's okay?"



My smile got bigger. 



"Cor blimey, what have I gotten myself into?" She said as she threw her arms around my neck and gave me another of her lip-to-lip smack-dab-on-the-mouth kisses right there in the park. And, like the last time, it took a second-and-a-half for the woody to develop. 



The kiss lasted a long time. When we came up for air, Cynthia and John Halford were standing there.



"It looks like you were right, Val." Said John.



I looked at the three of them. "I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid."



Hoping for the best, Val had convinced her friends to bring her and her suitcase from their home in Birmingham, about two hours away. The idea was that, if they were, in fact, able to find me and convince me that she was serious about making something of our relationship, that she would go with me to London and fly home with me in order to spend some time with me.



We transferred her suitcase to my waiting car and said goodbye to the Halford's.



The first thing we did in London was to upgrade her ticket to first class. She had planned to stay for a week and we left that intact ... just in case things didn't work out.



Later that evening, after another of her toe-curling kisses, we learned that getting rid of my woody took more effort than her just touching it. 



All that was eight months ago and she and her brother have just opened their first 'Chippy' in Denver. We divide our time between England and Denver.



Life is good.

