[Mandologica] Show Me

"Show Me" Chapter 1, by Mandologica
Pages 58-58 (LQ)

Slide 57.jpg Slide 58.jpg
 
I like the story line. It's a nice change from the all too common -- "Oh, no! My son has a painful erection because he accidently saw me naked so now I have to help him get rid of it!"
 
At first, I found it interesting.
Now, I have serious doubts.
For starters, I already can't stand the character of Pippa...
Charlotte is too insecure, and the son comes across as a marginal figure.
It doesn't even feel like a typical Mandologica work, even though I follow their projects closely (though I’ll probably be retired by the time they finish everything).
Mind you, this is constructive criticism, because I have a bad feeling about the way the story is unfolding; for instance, I would have handled the son's entrance from the kitchen to the living room differently.
I would have had him eavesdrop on the conversation and momentarily save the situation by walking up to his mother, kissing her, and introducing himself as her boyfriend.
That would have added a lot of interest.
The rest could remain practically unchanged.
 
I like the premise, it's different and I love how reluctant mom is in contrast to how hopeful her son is. I hope Pippa will want further convincing!
 
Mac100 said:
I like the premise, it's different and I love how reluctant mom is in contrast to how hopeful her son is. I hope Pippa will want further convincing!
Click to expand...
Pippa if you follow her from Teamwork is not stupid I have the feeling she is pretty sure he is her son, and she is having good time wathing how far they are willing to go to convince her of the contrary. Besides Pippa likes incest.
 
Then, bring it on! That's a great thought -- Pippa knows what's going on and gets a kick out of pressuring Charlotte into an incestuous relationship with her very anxious son.
 
I have never known of a job where you have to exposed with you boyfriend or girlfriend in front of the one who is hiring you to apply, at least in a serious job ha ha
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top